In which I feel paper cup-y but know I’m crystal

by Craig on April 13, 2011

Our Lord has made us like Waterford crystal.

But I feel like a paper cup.

Still there is the Name.

This is part two, part one being yesterday. It’s right down below if you’d like to peek. This will make more sense if you do (◠‿◠).

Anyway…

“the name”

As James writes it (James 2:7)

“the noble name that was invoked over you”

This name borne by the Christians to whom James wrote was “invoked” over them. When they were baptized it was in the “name” of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.

James doesn’t say the name “Christian”. He shies away from the name of Our Lord for the almost all of his letter. John does something like this too, not mentioning his own name in his Gospel. He calls himself “the apostle Jesus loved” instead.

But this name I bear? It should mean something. No?

I’m tied to the name and it with me.
I belong to the name, and He belongs to me.
And I can act like glass – but there’s that 24% lead in me that makes me cyrstal.

It’s there to add weight to my character – to add brilliance.

So it’s not the best situation right now.
The body is all sorts of crazy.
The situation is … challenging.
And it’s a chance to choose.

I can act like glass.
Nobody would blame me.
Most people are glass anyway.
I’ll fit right in.
But I won’t stand out either.
I’ll do dishonor to the “name”

So today I fight this. It’s been days since I had any meaningful sleep. I’ve been through this many times before. This is the point it all starts to break down.

I’m not going to “pretend” and act like bright shiny crystal.
I don’t have to do that with you, right?
But I admit that I am crystal
maybe broken crystal


but crystal still the same – no matter how I feel.

I know you have your own trials today too.

And if you’re reading this it’s because you’re crystal.

I’m praying today for strength to act like crystal, decide things like crystal, take this body and mind that feels barely like a paper cup – and respond like crystal.

In your trials this day know that you will be prayed for. Because I’ll be praying for me, and every time I do, I might as well just pray for you too, huh?

And I know you guys. You’re nice – so you’ll want to pray for my sleep to get better. But I’m thinking that’s not the prayer. It’s just my body. It’s just the thorn. If I’m not a Christian then my body is all I have. If I bear the name “Christian” then the body is only part.

So not to worry.

I want God’s will above anything – even the things I want really really bad.

Like sleep.

To respond like crystal

when we feel like paper cups

that’s the thing.

And it’s not pretending

because we we’re Waterford,
we’re Mikasa,
we’re Swarovski,

we reflect His brilliance
and we have his “weight”

even if we feel paper cup-y.

God bless

{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }

A. April 13, 2011 at 10:04 am

“I’m praying today for strength to act like crystal, decide things like crystal, take this body and mind that feels barely like a paper cup – and respond like crystal.”

Thank you for these insights, and for guiding our thoughts and prayers to higher ground. Higher ground prayers trust God for all the unmentioned details-like lack of sleep and piggies.

Reply

Craig April 13, 2011 at 10:12 am

A. I am functioning far better than I ought to be – given the situation. It’s not my body that’s holding me up, so thank you for the prayers – prayers work. Praying for you too – such an unexpected result of blogging. God Bless you A.

Reply

marlece April 13, 2011 at 8:35 pm

Mr. Craig….have you been tested to see if there is a medical reason for your lack of sleep? Have you had a sleep study? This is so weird because I have talked to soooo many wives lately who are dealing with their husband in this area and it seems to be a legit medical reason why. Anyway, we do have a healer who made our body to rest and I ask in His name that you be HEALED! You are chrystal (by the way)

Blessings, Marlece

Reply

Craig April 13, 2011 at 8:52 pm

I should probably write a post sometime about the sleep thing. I’ve been to clinics and had lots of doctors and I do have sleep apnea – but there is just something else – something in the more than decade that I’ve had this that just prevents me from staying asleep, of getting deep sleep, or sometimes – like right now even sleeping period. It’s not stress, it’s physiological in some way. I have tried every single treatment possible. If God sends a miracle – I’ll take it. If this thorn stays with me until I leave this earth – I’ll take that too. It’s just a thorn. just a thorn. Thank you for asking – in short – yes there is a medical reason – just nobody can figure it out. God Bless you Marlece.

Reply

marlece April 14, 2011 at 9:29 am

Oh good, I am glad that you take the initative to find the issue, but I am also sorry the problem can’t be found…..

So, this does call for a miraculous only our God kind of healing!

I will take time to pray for you before I put my head to the pillow each night.

Sweet dreams in Jesus name….Marlece

Reply

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