In which I conclude that spiders are evil

by Craig on August 3, 2011

So yesterday I had a wee rant.

source

It started on Deep into Love, (here)  and overflowed onto Deep into Scripture (here).

It was a spider rant.

Gah! Spiders! All full of blargh, and meh.

And so here’s the question. Spiders?

Part of God’s creation design … or nasty little byproducts of the Fall?

Let me begin with this. They’re bloodsuckers!

And how about a nice spider free…

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blanket statement…

I think there may have been butterflies, and maybe fireflies in the Garden, but that’s about it for the bugs.

And in the Bible, thankfully, spiders only crawl out twice.

First, in the not so cheery book of Job.

So is the end of everyone who forgets God, and so shall the hope of the godless man perish. His confidence is but a gossamer thread and his trust is a spider’s web. He shall rely upon his family, but it shall not last; he shall cling to it, but it shall not endure. (Job 8:13-15)

See – not good!

And in Isaiah:

Their works are evil works, and deeds of violence come from their hands. Their feet run to evil, and they are quick to shed innocent blood; Their thoughts are destructive thoughts, plunder and ruin are on their highways. The way of peace they know not, and there is nothing that is right in their paths; Their ways they have made crooked, whoever treads them knows no peace. (IS 59:6-8)

See! Not good!!

Okay, admittedly, in context, the verses in Isaiah are about humans…
and how messed up we are…
and how in need of a Savior we are…
because…

because…

wait for it…

we’re like spiders…

See! Not good!

And there is this little passage in Proverbs about how clever ants are, and how steadfast and persistent rock badgers are, and how locusts are good team players. In the King James version Proverbs 30:28 reads:

The spider taketh hold with her hands, and is in kings’ palaces.

It sounds like a compliment to spiders…
Except it’s not a good translation of the Hebrew…
The word…

שְׂמָמִית

pronounced shaymaweet (but said like a Bedouin camel trader)
is not “spider”…

it’s

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“lizard”.

The best translation is more like this…

“Lizards – you can catch them with your hands, yet they find their way into king’s palaces.”

Lizards are vulnerable, humble, clever…

…and they eat spiders!

Good for them!

And now a little biblical logic.

Insects are kind of the garbage disposal system of the planet.
They kill stuff, and eat stuff, and recycle the dead stuff.
In the garden, before the Fall, there was no death…
and thus no need for this recycling system.

So where’d they come from?

Well obviously God made them.
He made everything.
But I think he made them after the fall.
Or, if they were around before the fall they were all cute and cartoon-ish.

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But I think, most likely, there are spiders in the world because of Adam.

Nice job!

Because of sin, the world is broken for a while, and there are hurricanes, and tornadoes, and bad things happening to good people, and good things happening to bad people, and illness…

and spiders…

and that’s my story …

and I’m stickin’ to it.

Spiders are evil.

So there.

Oh, and I’m linking today with a magnificent writer Emily@

 

and if you hearted this at all,
or if you think others might find it useful,
would you consider sharing it in one of the ways below?

{ 35 comments… read them below or add one }

Martha Orlando August 3, 2011 at 9:55 am

Just loved this! Great argument, Craig!

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Craig August 3, 2011 at 12:14 pm

Martha, you are an absolute joy. Thank you very much – the argument is possibly colored a little bit because of my apparent spider “issues” – but I think it’s a pretty solid biblical argument :-) God bless you Martha!

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Anna August 3, 2011 at 11:40 am

I love the cartoon above with the pink dress and red hair! That made me laugh.

About the garden… good argument there about the spiders! I’ve often wondered about the dreaded mosquitoes, too, lol! It’s interesting to wonder whether they were cute and friendly in the beginning or came after the fall.

I’ve used a similar argument about winter… apparently it was warm enough so there was no need for Adam and Eve to have clothes…so winter must be a by-product of the fall, too?! (I know they needed clothing after sinning, not b/c cold weather immediately sprung upon them…) I don’t know if I’m right, but it kind of makes sense to me. Maybe seasons were there, just not harsh?? Anyway, thanks for sharing, nice post!

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Craig August 3, 2011 at 12:19 pm

first, thank you Anna for noticing the cartoon – it took the longest time to find a good ranting type picture that wasn’t all angry – but had a little bit of funny – you know?

about the mosquitoes – my guess is that they also came post – fall. I’m not really a believer in the cute cartoon-y insects. I’m sticking with just butterflies before the fall. And what a good point about winter – maybe the world got tilted after the fall – and winter only came then – or maybe the garden was climate controlled. Anyway, thank you very much Anna, and as always God bless and keep you!

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Lisa notes... August 3, 2011 at 12:41 pm

So this is the second blog I’ve read today on spiders. Maybe I’m destined to see a few? ha. I don’t like them either. Stick to your story, Craig. :-)

Thanks for your well-wishes for my daughter’s wedding on Saturday. Yes, I know you’re right – there will be tears from my eyes on that day!

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Craig August 3, 2011 at 12:48 pm

Gah! spiders are just so full of blargh and meh that I just can’t stand! And thank you – I will be sticking to my story! Spiders are gross! And I hope the wedding goes perfectly on Saturday – not because weddings have to go perfectly – but I know how every bride wants a perfect day. God bless you on Saturday – and the tears – they are the funniest kind of tears – happy – sad – so different. Maybe they’re a little bit like the tears you have have when you see your newborn baby for the first time. I don’t know that – only you could tell me that. Let me know. God bless and keep you and daughter/bride to be, Lisa!

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Rachel August 3, 2011 at 1:45 pm

Genius.

I share your loathing for those 8-legged demons. Beautifully profound tie-in, though.

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Craig August 3, 2011 at 2:44 pm

Rachel, thank you – thank you. And maybe they are demons – maybe spiders ARE demons – at least the poisonous ones – but even the nonpoisonous ones are creepy. And if the Bible has nothing good to say about them…

And thank you for the comment about the tie-in – I’m glad there was a tie-in to Scripture – because without that it would only be a rant. Nothing wrong with rants – but the tie-in made it better. Thank you again Rachel, and God bless and keep you.

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brian August 3, 2011 at 3:49 pm

funny saw many spiders today…took a kid hiking and we came upon a web that had to be 8 foot wide…it was beautiful…and had a huge spider in the middle…another we saw was coccooning a meal for later but it fascinated the boy i was with…eh they are not all bad…smiles.

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Craig August 3, 2011 at 6:10 pm

Brian, I’m shocked. How can a poet like spiders! Let me clue you in – spiders. hate. poetry.

but you didn’t know that!

Still feel the same about them?

And when I’ve seen those webs in the woods – and the huge spider in the middle – that’s when my feet start a movin – I’ve seen those movies were those big spiders come down and the people – and if it’s in the movies – then you know it’s true. So I’d consider myself lucky to be alive if I were you ((((( all smiles))))). God Bless you.

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Julie@OnePennyJumblePacket August 3, 2011 at 5:33 pm

LOL! Very funny post. I completely agree with Ariel. What was Disney thinking when they put a redhead in pink dress. Just awful! :-)

As for the pre-fall/post-fall insects — I can’t say that I’ve given it much thought other than to say there were probably dung beetles in the garden. They’re not particularly attractive, but they’re awfully useful. 😉

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Julie@OnePennyJumblePacket August 3, 2011 at 5:46 pm

Sorry, I’m back. Here is a follow-up argument for spiders (because I feel bad about them getting picked on). They’re not my favorite creature, but I’m compelled to stick up for the underdog. 😉

If we say they didn’t exist pre-fall because there was no death and no need to recycle, by the same logic, could we say that none of the currently carnivorous mammals, birds, or reptiles existed? Most of them exist to cull herds that would otherwise overpopulate, right?

Ok, I know that a lot of theologians believe that carnivores became carnivores after the fall and this was part of why in Genesis 6 God was sorry He created “both man and beast, creeping thing and birds of the air” and why He said “the earth is filled with violence through [all flesh].” But I still think it’s a valid analogy, and I’d hate to think of a garden without kitty cats.

So maybe, before the fall, spiders were really sweet and they sat around eating curds and whey instead of other bugs. Maybe they were so nice that even Little Miss Muffet would’ve liked them. :-)

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Craig August 3, 2011 at 6:06 pm

first of all Julie, so that’s why the red hair and the pink dress are worth a rent!!!! I’m a guy – I would never have put those two things together. You don’t put a red haired girl in a pink dress – who knew? I am SO learning all the time!! by the way, I really did laugh out loud when I read your comment. And I’m still smiling. Thank you.

Now, the arguments – which also made me happy :-)

Don’t feel too sorry for the spiders – they’re not the underdog – they have things and they suck blood – but if you want to feel sorry for them you can – because that’s compassion –
– and compassion is love – and God hearts love.

and I can’t counter your argument about excluding some of the nicer animals – like cats. So since it’s my game – and I started it – and in my family we say, “when you make the game – you make the rules”. I’m putting cats in the Garden of Eden, and the pretty birds – but not crows because they’re ugly and they irritate me, and some dogs. And I’m saying that before the fall they didn’t hunt each other and kill each other – because lions were laying with lambs and such. But to be honest – I can’t 100% counter your argument without cheating – so I yield – except I CAN cheat because I made the game – and this the rules – so I still win – but you do too :-)

Which leads us back to – if spiders were around before the fall it might well be as you wrote, “spiders were really sweet and they sat around eating curds and whey” – or as I wrote – they were the cute cartoon-ish spiders – so we both win again!!

and…

You really made me think, and you really made me smile, and even laugh, and I heart that, so you win again too.

and I win because I smiled and laughed…

So there! :-)

God Bless!!

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Julie@OnePennyJumblePacket August 3, 2011 at 6:32 pm

LOL! That was very well argued. Ok, I yield and will agree that we both win. Gold medals and prizes all around!

God bless!

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Cindy@12Tribes August 3, 2011 at 7:26 pm

Ok, I loved it, AND all the comments so far…and as I began to write this, an image popped in my head (no, it wasn’t me in the movie “Eight Legged Freaks” as one of the survivors or you as one of the people who got stuck in giant spider spun cocoons – or was I in the cocoon and you were a survivor??!!), but the image I got was of Jesus smiling and a big belly laugh party going on among the angels and the trinity over this ENTIRE conversation and all it has sparked…I just know He enjoys when we get all theological and hone our apologetic skills with tongues in cheek and true curiosity about “just what WAS He thinking???”…and some day, I hope to read in His blog/book in heaven about this very blog post, comments, and resulting conversation as Malachi 3:16 talks about!!

Blessings on you and Laska!

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Craig August 4, 2011 at 6:04 pm

thank you Cindy – and the comments have been kind of magnificent – yours included :-). So you think that Our Lord reads my blog? he hardly ever comments! :-) Maybe God is a blog “lurker”! Thank you Cindy – your comment was full of smiles. And blessings on you too!

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Martha Orlando August 3, 2011 at 8:40 pm

Oh, can we add another to the “after the fall” category? I just went out on my deck only to be met by three cockroaches! We live in the woods, so this is inevitable, but I do not relish their presence. I guess God has a fantastic sense of humor and way beyond my comprehension!

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Craig August 4, 2011 at 6:05 pm

Martha, I’m sorry I’m late replying to your comment – although I don’t really feel like I have to because I replied to you in my post :-) no cock roaches in the garden – and no cockroaches in the kingdom of God – that’s my story – sticking to it! God bless you Martha.

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Kristin August 3, 2011 at 9:31 pm

I saw a spider today in my garage. . .I thought of you and squished it. Maybe you could write about ticks. . .they really BUG me. . .(pun intended) :)

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Craig August 4, 2011 at 6:08 pm

Kristin, I’m sorry I’m late replying to your comment – although, as I said to Martha – in the comment above yours – I replied to you – in a way – by including you in today’s post – and of course linking back to your blog that I heart. And don’t think for a second that the thought of including that little insect pun didn’t cross my mind :-) God bless you Kristin, and thank you. ( in case you don’t get a chance to read the blog – no – there will be no ticks!)

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A. August 4, 2011 at 1:26 am

Craig, very funny conversation here and yes, good arguments. :) I am going to get all serious-y here and say that I wish there truly was a translation that did it all: meaning, context, literal as much as was appropriate, etc. Seeing that spider is really lizard…makes me wonder what else is really what else? And some times it makes a huge difference or at least the contextual understanding does and it isn’t usually provided in simple bibles nor is it always agreed upon per some issues. Sigh. So thank you for any and all clarifications you provide.

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Craig August 4, 2011 at 6:12 pm

A. You know I heart all “serious-y”. I don’t know if there is one translation that gets so deep into it – the way that I’m able to – the way anyone is able to – verse by verse. They have committees – and do some amazing work. I think that kind of Bible would have to be a bookshelf of books. But anybody can go online and check out the Greek or Hebrew. It’s an amazing time we’re living in – when our knowledge reaches back to the original languages – and those original languages are available to anyone. There’s so much good information out there. One of the benefits of seminary was squishing may be 15 years worth of study into 3 1/2. But then – I’m pretty sure a lot squished out of my head as they were trying to squish it in. God bless you A.!

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alittlebitograce August 4, 2011 at 12:57 pm

So until a couple of years ago, I would have shivered just at the mention of spiders. I wouldn’t even kill them myself, preferring my husband to do it. Then one day after screaming when I saw a spider, my then 3 yr old had these words for me ” Mommy, don’t be siwwy(silly)! Spiders are our fwiends(friends)!” After that I began to look for the beauty in spiders. I began taking pictures of them, being less afraid from behind the camera. As I looked for good in them, my perspective on spiders changed. I still prefer reptiles to spiders, but I now welcome them to my yard(and certain corners of my house) to keep the flies and ants down.

Your scriptural perspective was amusing and the pictures illustrating it are great. :)

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Craig August 4, 2011 at 6:16 pm

you know –I think I have to admit to a little bit of arachnophobia – and I don’t think I’ll be taking pictures of them anytime soon – and they may be friends because they eat other bugs – but they’re creepy – and gross – and bloodsuckers! and I don’t like them – and I’m not willing to take the wonderful steps that you took in order to get to like them better. But God bless you for doing so – I think you get treasure in heaven for that :-) and thank you for noticing the pictures – I work really hard to find just the perfect ones – so that made me smile. I HEART PICTURES!! Thank you, and God bless and keep you and all of yours.

PS reptiles or another story – maybe another post sometime :-)

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Brandee August 5, 2011 at 11:05 pm

Funny! My husband hates spiders, too! (It makes me laugh. Until he says something about mice or rats and then *shudder* I feel sorry for laughing.)

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Craig August 6, 2011 at 10:34 am

spiders are insidious and ghastly and terrifying – so I’m with your husband on that one – an i’m with you on rats – except for the white ones they do experiments on because they deserve mercy and they have cute pink eyes – mice I don’t have a problem with especially the cartoon-ish kind. Thank you Brandee – so in conclusion – because of your husband no spiders in the garden – and because of you – no rats – and only Disney mice. God bless you.

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nathan smith May 11, 2013 at 4:09 pm

i really like this argument but i must say a couple of things spiders arent demons they are capible of being taimed and not many animals can be taimed and infact i have seen many videos of loving and caring spiders and i saw a really good one with who indeed was the galieth bird eating spider and yet this spider lay in the palms of a 6 year old and courld up in a ball the spider showed its careness for the child and well i loved it seen the spider gaze up to the camera with happynes yes i saw happyness in the deep black eyes the spider must have been there all the childs life because the father spoke to the boy saying that he had the spider before the child was born the spider must have been like 10 years old or somthing but i know there is good in spiders i see it all the time but there is always a few spiders that have no need for there agressive behaver

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d dunn August 24, 2014 at 2:47 am

if i were the devil i would hate spiders spiders …… spiders are amazing creatures they are in poor houses and palaces they eat harmful insects…. spiders are not insects btw that would destroy crops they eat flys they eat all things that spread disease they are not parasites they spin amazing webs they are one one of gods most perfect creations …. yes if you were the devil you would hate spiders

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Craig August 28, 2014 at 2:49 pm

valid points all. I still stick with my opinion though :) But what you said, all true. THe problem is that we need death in this world to have life. Stupid broken world. It’ll be fixed one day. Thank you. God Bless

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d dunn September 13, 2014 at 10:06 pm

sorry it took so long to reply stick to it my mom hated spiders btw lol and true it will be fixed better sooner than later God bless you to

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Terry February 11, 2015 at 7:03 am

I have always been scared but thanks to you I KNOW YOU are RIGHT. Recognise your MORTAL ENEMY. But knowledge is POWER.I and NOT SCARED!THEY DIE!!!

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Terry February 11, 2015 at 7:10 am

My cat gizmo loved me she DIED in that house as well,she was nearly 20 in human terms she was blind deaf she would not leave me!!! Sorry I’m crying

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Craig February 11, 2015 at 1:10 pm

Terry, first completely appropriate use of the ALL CAPS button, second I’m glad I have a fellow spider fearer, third think you. And my old cat, Froofy, he was 22 actual years old, and I remember the day he died. I remember him hugging me so tight I couldn’t believe it. It sounds like Gizmo knew very well who loved him or her best. And there is a good case to be made scripturally for Gizmo being in heaven right now. God bless and keep you.

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Terry February 11, 2015 at 1:19 pm

I used to live with. BED BUGS

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Craig February 11, 2015 at 1:25 pm

definitely post creation creatures.

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