In which feelings are fleeting

by Craig on January 25, 2012

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Does faith sprout whimsy’s wings and fly above the moon?
Or is it the heart of a human that sinks quicker than faith’s wings can fly.

No one has a faith the size of a mustard seed.

If you don’t feel your faith is it there?

Is it gone?

Is it lost?

Where is faith when feeling betrays it?

Is faith only feeling?

If that’s true…
when there is no feeling…
there is then no faith.

There has been deepest dark lately…
rays of light shooting through…
flashes of faith…
the flame of prayer…

if you don’t feel your faith…

source

is your faith not there?

Faith is not feeling…
held but not captured…
given not purchased…
cultivated, gardened…
and yes, a bit earned.

Faith never fail us.

We. Fail. It.

It has wings it does.

It needs those wings to fly…
above doubt above dark above feeling.

You fight for faith when it wanes.

You fight for faith.

You may not feel your faith…
and when you can’t feel your faith…
when it seems it’s fluttering…
when it seems to flee…
doubt the doubts and believe your faith…

source

…until your faith gives you better eyes to see.

Faith is eyes closed on wire above stone.
Faith is eyes open through the fire alone.

Faith is not to feel.
Faith is not to know.
Faith is to believe…

believe.

Believe.

You breathe it in…
brush it’s wings.

But the human heart is a poor vessel for that which it believes.

And the Source and Subject and Object of faith…
will He protect the human hearts frail…

from their fragility…
from their doubt…
from their feelings or without?

It is the fool that says there is no God…
and a fool’s errand to hang onto feeling as though…
it is the Subject the Source and the Object.

If the feeling is absent…
the faith can still remain.

It must…

or not a one is saved.

If it’s gone when it’s not felt…
if it’s only emotion…
it’s far too inconstant…
a drum beating unsteady…
a heart prone to seduction…

there is a way that seems right but leads to destruction.

It’s the Source and the Subject and the Object that sustains faith…

in His hands…
reaching to ours…
and holding eternally firm…
that which we can’t hold on to firmly enough.

The human heart is a poor container for that which it believes.

More tomorrow…

this first month of this year named “see”…

has me bobbing a bit on its waves…

but holding on ever more steadily…

to That which keeps me afloat.

Please come back.

{ 14 comments… read them below or add one }

Hillcrest Cottage January 25, 2012 at 9:57 am

Faith is a muscle. The more we use faith… the stronger it becomes. And God will orchestrate and allow circumstances in the believer’s life which will cause that muscle to stretch and become stronger. Athletes hate that coach which yells, “Keep on running!” when to do so it is very hard. But, in the end, the athlete knows the reward of the pushing is well worth the pain.

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Craig January 25, 2012 at 3:08 pm

I heart that analogy – faith without exercise becomes dormant – mine’s getting some good exercise lately – it’ll be fine. This wasn’t in the plans for being written today – inspiration just kind of hit – and I started typing. And our HEAD COACH assures me that all is well with my soul. Thank you Bev – God bless you and yours.

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A. January 25, 2012 at 12:07 pm

This is kind of like what Laska was talking about, isn’t it? Practicing the good thing….practicing appropriating our faith even in the absence of feelings. The feelings may follow quickly…or not, but we still make our choice to spend our ‘faith dollars’ in Him or in ‘not Him’.

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Craig January 25, 2012 at 3:10 pm

frum laska foor u – i m smat katz (ツ) u r nise A

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Debra January 25, 2012 at 1:42 pm

Craig, a song for you today…
Faith is the bird that sings when the dawn is still dark. ~Rabindranath Tagore
http://www.seafarerpress.com/sound/faith_is_the_bird_ssa.mp3

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Craig January 25, 2012 at 3:06 pm

I heart a good chorale (sp) piece. I had heard the saying – I’d not heard the song. My faith is better for this little bump. Thank you Debra – God bless you!!

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Nacole January 25, 2012 at 3:10 pm

wow, Craig! and just–wow!!! this is so poetic and beautiful.

my favorites:

“Does faith sprout whimsy’s wings and fly above the moon?
Or is it the heart of a human that sinks quicker than faith’s wings can fly.”

” Faith is eyes closed on wire above stone.
Faith is eyes open through the fire alone”

“Believe.

You breathe it in…
brush it’s wings.

But the human heart is a poor vessel for that which it believes”

a fool’s errand…ive been guilty of this…very sobering thoughts. only the fool says there is no God. i needed this, Craig. how did you know?

when your faith wanes, you fight. you fight for faith.

oh that i would fight! that i would believe!!!

your writing has taken a turn for sure. you are getting stronger. i am in love with this prose today.

blessings,

Nacole

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Craig January 25, 2012 at 3:44 pm

I’m not sure we can expect this level of poetry in my prose to continue – this was inspired by what’s happening right now – it just poured out – and then the million edits – but thank you my friend – any improvement at all in my writing is only because of who I read! Blessings to you too Nacole – and you know what? As I was editing this – I thought of you – more than once – I knew you’d like it!

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Dawn January 26, 2012 at 8:47 am

When we persist in the darkness, when it is arid and we seem to have lost our way, the real faith comes. Hillcrest Cottage said it so metaphorically.

St John of the Cross says when we persist even when we see the really ugly, experience the unending dryness and ache till we are numb with the aching that we become mature enough to do kingdom work. When we see ourselves for who we are, recognize we can only operate in His grace and subsequently extend that same grace to others, we are on the precipice of understanding the “mystery that has been hidden for ages and generations but has now been revealed to the Lord’s people…which is Christ in you, the hope of glory.” Colossians 1:26,27c

Ah, this darkness, it is a good thing for it makes us into vessels fit for His service,
Dawn

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Craig January 28, 2012 at 4:02 pm

Wow – THAT is hopeful – makes me feel better – thank you Dawn. And so, when is this book review happening? (ツ) God bless!!

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Victoria January 27, 2012 at 2:14 pm

so many thoughts…so many stanzas to like. so many great comments and great comments to comments.
I love inspiration.

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Craig January 28, 2012 at 4:00 pm

Thank you Victoria – I heart the comments too. And you used the word “stanzas” – does this mean I’m developing a kind of hybrid way of writing 1/2 poetry – 1/2 prose (and 1/2 pictures) (ツ)

God bless!!!

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Dawn January 28, 2012 at 8:11 pm

It is interesting that you should say stanzas Victoria. Did you know that Dark Night of the Soul is an exposition of stanzas from a poetic piece or were you referring to Craig’s post? It is amazing how God is bringing us altogether in this place. I really wish Craig were reading Dark Night because he is so astute with this kind of literature from the early fathers.

The book report is unfolding day by day here, but I’m not sure I’m the best reporter. At the moment I seem to be the most willing so I am forging on. A. told me she was going to pick up a copy and read it again. I hope she pops in here. I could use her intellectual commentary as well as Cora’s extensive bibliographic referencing. I really need what is unfolding here and I need everyone’s help to understand what this early church father seemed to understand so well.

I have been helping my second son’s family learn to serve at the local shelter and food kitchen all day, but I intend to study with St John of the Cross tonight until I can’t stay awake anymore. My family really blesses me as I watch them love on others. I will worship tomorrow and go where He leads. Beyond that?

I’m off to read right now,
Dawn

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Craig January 29, 2012 at 6:33 am

first of all, I totally get the “beyond that?” – know that I have prayed– Just did. And I heart you’re serving family – I still haven’t planted in the church – and I won’t today –although I suspect being part of the body of our Lord – a local one – that’s a good defense against the Evil One – strength in numbers. Anyway – read – write – include lots of quotes – don’t worry about footnotes – the “Dawn” version will be perfect. I’ll heart it!! God bless!

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