In which is the thought of suicide

May 24, 2012

source   My answer was a firm, “No.” The question was from the doctor who put me on the drug that pulled me into an incredibly dark place. The question was, “Are you having suicidal thoughts?” Now I do have to tell you that my insomnia… it drags hard toward depression… but it seems not […]

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In which are a thousand thank you’s to God (#’s 910-919)

May 21, 2012

There are rose bushes outside… once full of blooms, buds, and roses… stripped bare by the storm. But now there are buds… and soon will be roses. The plant doesn’t know how this happens… it just reaches for the sun…and it does. Thank You Lord… #910… that I don’t need to know everything, but just […]

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In which is sin…seeing what I didn’t…now seeing as I should

May 17, 2012

source So the doctor tried a new medication… an attempt to treat my 15 year old insomnia. I’m thankful for the effort. But this thorn in my side? Our Lord isn’t finished with it… and it’s not finished with me… yet. The “cure” I was given was drastically worse than the illness. So I close […]

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In which there’s something in nothing…and the consequences of sin

May 15, 2012

source Today, not much Scripture, just the beginnings, I think, of a metaphor. Mainly because it is a struggle right now to do anything at all of any value. If you read me you know that for 15 years I have effectively had about three hours of sleep a night. Enough said. No whining today. […]

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In which are more Proverbs 31 thank you’s to mom

May 12, 2012

She is clothed with strength and dignity, and laughs… (Proverbs 31:25) You laughed most and best with family… playing cards or games around the kitchen table… until we rolled on the floor and stomachs hurt… or you had to…*ahem*… excuse yourself. ツ But something about this breaks my heart too. Your life was constant struggle… […]

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In which there are more Proverbs 31 thank you’s to Mom (p2)

May 10, 2012

source “She rises while it is still night…” (Proverbs 31:15) “her lamp is never extinguished….” (Proverbs 31:18) Mom… constantly thinking about us… always feathering the nest… crying happy tears when we could see… saving the bitter ones for after we were in bed. And I never figured out how I could make a peanut butter […]

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In which is a “thank you” for mom

May 8, 2012

ssource Since my mom left this earth, I’ve always “remembered” her on her birthday, not Mother’s day. Because of Ann, this year, I’ll “remember” her…twice. A wise mom is “wisdom”. Psalm 14 is about wisdom… and at least in its very first verse… it describes wisdom as a mom. “Wisdom [a wise mom] builds her […]

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In which there is handwriting on the wall

May 5, 2012

source I was a darn new baby Christian. It was an evening worship service. I was investigating my new faith, even though not quite all the way out of the egg. And I didn’t realize that I was approaching faith, not the way it was meant to be approached, but instead, the way I had […]

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In which there are baseballs and softballs

May 3, 2012

source First the sky turned black in mid-day… then streetlights flickered on… trees swayed like wheat in a field. No rain… just an eerie still. source Laska the Love Kitty was on the porch watching with me. There’s something magnetic about a huge storm gathering. No? But suddenly it sounded like someone had taken a […]

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In which there are ants…and a news reporter…and tournament results

May 1, 2012

source Worries…it’s like they have six legs and grabby mandibles… each of them desperate for just a crumb of a crumb of our peace. And Grace… eternally unfolding… revealing more and more beauty… gentle petals surrounding ambrosia… …and worries want their share of that too. source Do I really understand grace at all if I […]

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